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What is sexy? Beautiful traits that have nothing to do with looks

What does it mean to be “sexy”? The word “sexy” has been used in so many different ways. Being sexy often has a negative connotation; if you’re sexy, you cannot be intelligent, accomplished and kind. The polarising idea of what “sexy” is might explain why so many of us have a complicated relationship with this word. While there is no doubt physical attractiveness contributes to sexiness, other traits that have nothing to do with looks can be as irresistible. Being sexy is a badge of honour to describe the powerful energy we all have within us. How do we access that special energy, that “je ne sais quoi” that you just can’t put your finger on but is irresistibly appealing? 

Being comfortable in your own skin 

Most of us spend so many years trying and fit into a box, conforming to an ideal image of a woman that often does not align with who we really are. A sexy woman defines beauty by her own standards not the ones of others. Every culture has its own beauty standards, often times these are limited and even unattainable. Being sexy is knowing how to revel in your own individuality. A sexy woman practices self-care to make herself feel good not to gain validation from other people. Psychologists have found that simply believing that you are attractive increases your desirability to other people regardless of your physical looks. 

Knowing how to create connections with other people by making them feel good 

People are interested in other people that are interested in them. There is nothing more attractive than a woman that knows how to make other people feel good. Everyone is interesting in their own way and when you are able to see that and hold space for them to express that individuality, chances are, they will remember you as someone attractive. A sexy woman holds herself in quiet confidence, she has no problem putting the shine on others and making them feel good. Not everything is about her, on the contrary, she sees the beauty in others. Being “sexy” can be as simple as creating a positive emotion at the beginning of a new connection. 

Knowing your worth

People that know their worth will not seek other people’s attention and love because they’re self-sufficient in the sense that their own self-love is enough. There is something extremely sexy about someone that values their own time and energy and is selective about who they give their time and attention. Like with economic models, a lack of supply increases demands, a woman that doesn’t make herself too available will appear more desirable in the eyes of others. 

Enjoying yourself 

A woman that exudes good vibes and is fully present in whatever she is doing can be really sexy. Because she creates positive emotions in others, she has good communication skills and conflict resolution, she will appear more attractive. 

Not being afraid to be vulnerable 

Another trait that is found sexy is the ability to be interested in others, allowing them to open up and tell their life stories. She is not afraid of meaningful conversations and this makes other people incredibly drawn to her and looking forward to seeing her again. While saying too much at the wrong time can be a total turn-off, knowing how to be authentic and vulnerable at the right time can create a strong connection. 

Not comparing yourself with others 

Oftentimes, we start feeling ill-confident when we compare ourselves with other people. There is something truly sexy about someone who doesn’t give a damn about what other people think and do. Sexiness stems from the way you think about yourself. Feeling and being sexy are fueled by being unapologetically oneself. 

You might be interested to read our article about What does it mean to be in a higher vibration?

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